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Emotional Mastery

 

Note: it is recommended to read about Mindfulness as this is integrally related to this article.  

 

All emotions serve a purpose.  What can you learn from them?  What is the message?  When a situation occurs that results in a negative emotion you can jump up and down and the emotion may disappear but you have solved nothing.  Many of my clients that come to me for weight loss suffer from emotional hunger and not physical hunger. This is why so many (and including myself) went on diet after diet to later put on the weight again.  This is because the thoughts that were underlying the emotions were not questioned.  If you are feeling sad, you could go for a run and this will change your mood, however you have not looked at what thoughts were behind that emotion of sadness and so it will reoccur and you won't be free of it until you gain emotional mastery.  Another example is a mother or father shouting and being angry at their kids.  You want to react differently so seek emotional mastery. 

 

 

 

What is Emotional Mastery?

 

Emotional mastery is freedom, it's about controlling your emotions rather than them controlling you.  Jon Kabat-Zinn talks about anger and how it can be used consciously and on purpose, mindfully.  When you choose to use anger, then this energy can be useful.   Most of my life my anger was and sometimes still is not mindful.  I would loose control in the moment.  In this instant, my anger controls me.  Emotional mastery is gained though consciousness or being awake.  This is the same as saying being mindful of your present thoughts.  When we are mindful of them then we can catch a thought in the moment and be in control, rather than the thought control us.  We can question the thought and then the anger does not arise as there is no place for it.

 

Adyashanti talks in spontaneous awakening, about how a thought arises and how that thought may try to gain momentum and then it looses its momentum and falls away.  I thought this sounded wonderful at the time.  Yes I want that.  How can I do that?  I have learnt to gain emotional mastery and it's wonderful.  When you experience it you want more.  It's liberating and you go Wow Wow weeeee Wa!   I can report a calmness about me that was not their before.   

 

Fear is also a negative emotion based on something that may happen in the future.   It occurs in most people unconsciously and automatically.   Some of us have these horror movies that play on in your mind.   They tend to vary in creativity from scary to very scary.      

 

My mother used to worry about us when we went out and were back late.   She used to lie awake in bed and would not fall asleep until my brother or I had arrived home.     If a movie pops into my head, my mindfulness practice helps me to catch the fearful thoughts in the moment and say something like - well that’s imagination for you.   And you can even have a good laugh at this. 

 

Another example is of something that happened in the past.   For example if you have a fight or argument with your boss, your spouse or a friend and carry this around with you all week.   Then you may be frustrated or angry most of the time as the argument continues to play over and over in your mind.   This is something so far away from me now, but I experienced it and this was my life.   I used to say I was sensitive.   This gave me an excuse for being hurt most of the time.   The hurt turned into frustration and then anger.   Emotional mastery is worth the effort.   It requires mindfulness practice.   As with life coaching we take one step at a time.  

 

 

Part of gaining emotional mastery is to learn how the mind works ….

Please click her to continue reading about Emotional Matery  A Cognitive Beginning

 

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www.thework.com/theworkontheweb Byron Katie's online coaching program ( Use 119-1110 coupon code for an extra 2 weeks subscription as a bonus). 

 

 

                        

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